Top 5 Venus in Scorpio Songs

1. Jenny Was A Friend Of Mine
    by The Killers

'She said she loved me, but she had somewhere to go
She couldn't scream while I held I close
I swore I'd never let her go'

2.Rio
   by Duran Duran

'Moving on the floor now babe you're a bird of paradise
Cherry ice cream smile I suppose it's very nice
With a step to your left and a flick to the right you catch that mirror way out west
You know you're something special and you look like you're the best.'

3.A Girl Like You
   by Edwyn Collins

'You give me just a taste so I want more and more
Now my hands are bleeding and my knees are raw
 Now you've got me crawlin', crawlin' on the floor
 And I've never met a girl like you before'

4. I Don't Love You
   by My Chemical Romance

'Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
 So sick and tired of all the needless beating
 But baby when they knock you down and out
It's where you oughta stay.'

5. Roxanne
   by The Police

'I loved you since I knew you
I wouldn't talk down to you
I have you to tell just how I feel
I won't share you with another boy.'

Hell's Oven: The Latest Developments

Two years down, one more to go and then... Freedom. Uhuh. Not so soon. Maybe not from the responsibilities of an adult life but surely from rotting carcasses of rats on the roads and adulterated food. It's going to be another tough year of decision making and trying my best not to starve myself to the bone. Will I ever find out what my obscure goal is, in this lifetime or will I just keep dragging myself from one day to the next without feeling a thing for my surroundings or empathizing with my fellow companions? 

I haven't found romantic love, that's for sure. The only progress I've made so far, is on obtaining a degree in a subject which teaches me how to manipulate living beings within restrictions and make further advancements in the field of Science. My passion for this twisted line of work is the only factor keeping me from falling headfirst into a pool of depression and who knows what other kind of diabolical stuff waiting for me just round the corner. The past two years have transformed me into an adult who is unable to react appropriately in social situations or even display genuine emotion for that matter. I've become a psychopathic freak and I can't help but feel proud of this recent development. I feel just like a rebellious lab rat that is expected to behave in a certain manner in simulated environment, but chooses not to. I'd better learn to live by acceptable social norms or shall risk getting poisoned by the scientist who's tolerated my antics long enough.

Les Revenants (2012-)

Starring: Frédéric Pierrot, Samir Guesmi, Guillaume Gouix, Anne Consigny, Clotilde Hesme, Ana Girardot.

Set in a mountain town, the first season of this french TV serial consists of eight episodes with a haunting soundtrack provided by the Scottish band, Mogwai.

A young girl who had died in a bus accident four years earlier, returns to her family due to unresolved issues between her and her sister. Meanwhile, several others presumed to be dead, return to their loved ones. For instance, a young man in his teens reconciles with the woman whom he was to marry, a cannibalistic serial killer goes back to his brother and a mysterious boy visits a childless woman who had once been the victim of the serial killer. Although the reappearance of the dead does not cause much chaos initially, the townspeople begin to panic when confronted with hordes of them one night. The living and dead begin to develop strange scars on their bodies, the water level of the dam lowers, carcasses of wild animals are found in the sea, power failures occur more frequently as compared to before and people who try to leave town are unable to do so.

Check it out here: lesrevenants.canalplus.fr

The Secretary (2002)

Lee Holloway is a smart, quirky but self destructive woman in her twenties who returns to her hometown in Florida after a brief stay in a mental hospital. In search of relief from herself and her oppressive childhood environment, she starts to date a nerdy friend from high school and takes a job as a secretary in a local law firm, soon developing an obsessive crush on her older boss, Mr. Edward Grey. Slowly Lee and Mr.Grey embark on a more personal relationship behind closed doors, crossing lines of conduct into a deep realm of human sexuality, a unique love affair, in which the roles of dominance and submission suit both of them perfectly.

Secretary is a powerful and very unique love story, its bold, unflinching humour and strange yet seductive eroticism help explore the notion that love doesn't always occur the way we might expect.

The Road To Nowhere

'How about an open relationship?' He asks.
'Sure', I reply.

Now what sort of moron would be prepared to have feelings for someone who may not be a player but sure has the potential to develop into one later in his life? Exactly, Me. Only I could kid myself by saying I need the experience for a proper partnership that could come about in the future when I'm actually hurting deeply, at a soul level. I know for a fact that this new object of my affection intends to take me nowhere near rainbows and fluorescent butterflies but dump me in the familiar endless wasteland of unhealthy obsession and depression. I am expected to let out of my window every night, imaginary doves with love letters attached to their talons and wait it out for months and maybe years altogether for subliminal messages of some sort. He promises to let go when he no longer needs me, regardless of my need for his precious company. He makes me swear that I won't feel deeply for him or hold him back from a lifetime of fun despite knowing me to be an extreme romantic at heart. Why make so grand an entrance into my life when all I'm rewarded with are soured expectations and a future of instability with him? When all I can treasure is the slowly fading memory of his melodiously soothing voice, witty remarks and that slight squint he has when deep in thought? Why do this to someone who could sacrifice herself for you and love you eternally without passing judgement based on your appearance and status in society? Unfortunately for you, every road has a dead end and 'Nowhere' is the kind of word I only like to associate with dead-end affairs such as this one.

Stranger

I see you gaze penetratingly at her,

with eyes as black as the night.
What do you hope to see?

I've watched as you move your lips,
murmuring inaudibly into the crisp winter breeze.
What are you trying to say?

You've sniffed at the air more than once,
with that roman nose slightly inclined.
Whose scent do you so effortlessly detect?

What do you hope to hear
by tilting your head ever so subtely,
whenever she has something to say?

Do shivers running throughout your body
make the fine hairs on your skin stand,
as her arm accidently brushes yours?

Let go of all five senses for a moment
and you will discover that the key to your soul as well as her's,
lies within your reach.

Random Pics

 Above are snaps of my avian pal Lucius from Sharjah as well as a picture of our dearest hostel persian cat who pees on everything in his way. Below are pictures of my visit to Dubai Mall and the gigantic aquarium with its eels, stingrays, sharks and a variety of fish as well as a snap of Bloomingdales.

Goodbye Stranger!

Uptil seven years back, I lived at peace with myself and never felt the need to look for something more. This came to an end, with the arrival of the King of Swords who's largely responsible for the state I'm in right now. He lured me into his trap with an air of detachment and somewhat good looks (which are slowly waning). He drained me emotionally and then left me at the mercy of his pompous and quick-tempered partner in crime, the King of Pentacles. Now this wasn't the sort of guy I'd even look at twice, owing to his awkward mannerisms, priestly lectures and a terrible sense of humour but in my vulnerable state I needed all the support I could get. He further messed up the situation with an artless expression of simulated feelings and bogus sugar coated words. It took me about a year with the continuous replaying of 'Wouldn't it be Nice' by the Beachboys to recover from something I thought akin to Love, with his pusillanimous sibling, Knight of Swords tiptoe-ing all over my cyberspace like a stupid little girl and sending me crappy invitations over the internet which I couldn't have bothered about even if I was the loneliest person on the planet. Moving on from this assortment of freaks, I encountered several guys at college who weren't too out of this world but Boy, was King of Wands some catch! He never seemed aware of his surroundings and always danced to an imaginary tune in his head. Friends said that he was the biggest loser they'd ever encountered and warned me against losing my self-respect for him, but I didn't listen, as always. He was like a breath of fresh air from the emotionless freaks of the past. But several phone coversations and one love poem later made me realize he wasn't my type at all. And that brings me to my current situation. Seven years of disappointment, four assholes in succession, broken dreams and lowered expectations are enough to shatter one's hopes once and for all. So dearest Prince Charming, whoever you are and wherever you maybe at this exact instant, please understand why I'm giving up on my pursuit of you from this day on.

Forsyte Saga (2002)

Starring: Damian Lewis, Gina McKee and Rupert Graves.

This film centres around the life story of the beautiful but poor Irene, who makes a huge mistake by marrying Soames Forsyte and getting herself trapped in a loveless marriage. The controlling and seemingly hard-hearted Soames is unable to understand his artistic and independent young wife who refuses to be one of his 'possessions'. She in turn, is unable to tolerate his need for control over her and his inability to express passion without coming across as hurtful. Their relationship disintegrates within two years of marriage and Irene finds love in the penniless architect, Philip Bossiney. She threatens to leave Soames after he gets abusive and eventually does leave him, after Bossiney dies in an accident. Meanwhile, Jolyon Forsyte is busy carrying on a relationship with the governess of his daughter, June, following a separation from his wife, Frances. His family disowns him and he settles down to start a family with the governess Helene. He learns that his wife is dead and proposes marriage to the governess, who accepts. Helene dies later, and he falls in love with a mourning Irene in whom he sees a reflection of himself. The two of them have a son, Jon Forsyte. Soames moves on with his life and has a daughter, Fleur from his second marriage. Second cousins, Fleur and Jon fall in love, ignorant of their parents misdeeds and pasts. The series is concluded with Fleur finding out the truth about their parents and marrying a wealthy suitor, leaving Jon heartbroken.

Hell's Oven: Right at The Centre of It

Staying at home on my usual one-month long vacation has enabled me to take stock of my life and where I want to go from this point. One thing is for sure; I'm done living in hell's oven. It's the kind of sickening place where you get half your money's worth for every food item you purchase, making you some sort of semi-functional humanoid. It's a place where you're asked for a continuous output of information but are given measly input, on the condition that you're willing to travel several miles for it, as a result, rendering two-thirds of its population, complete morons. Everyone is more than glad to take material gifts from you, showering you with pseudo praise and affection soon after but leaving you to perish on the street from starvation right in front of their houses, months later. It's the kind of place where people occasionally complain about the pitiable state of their lives, but have no real intention of getting out of their self imposed plights. They yearn for monstrously ugly villas, truckloads of money, permanent jobs and faithful spouses. Yet, it never occurs to them that their pursuit of happiness could be simplified if only they could act saner, learn new skills, acquire more knowledge and become better people and not the pretentious saintly douchebags that they genuinely are. I'm mad at myself for having permitted others to drag me into this shithole and madder at time for not passing quicker. Spending another two and a half years here is unthinkable especially since I refuse to play along with the devil's helpers any longer. I'm sick of the 'friends' who leave you at the mercy of people they know you hate, leave you standing right beside them to witness their grotesque shagging sessions and sick of the ones who are never there for you when you most need them. Family tires me with their endless demands and impositions. Relatives on social networking sites happen to be the worst, with their pathetic posts which are in reality, desperate and annoying cries for attention. I mean who really wants to know what some sad old wrinkled hag wore to a party? You'd just be glad she's still alive and made it this far. And the flaky cousin who's constantly uploading photos and changing his relationship status to show the world how popular and desirable he still is? You'd have died never to be in his shoes, the day you witnessed him drop a bomb in a classroom full of cute eighth graders. Anyway, enough about the distant past. More recently, having to stand in the proximity of the Devil's spawn during my dearest grandfather's funeral, was more than I could bear. I could've grabbed a shovel right then, hit them all on the head and sent them flying straight into their afterlives. The disgust at encountering them wass just too overwhelming; the equivalent of having to endure an abscess in your brain for a few minutes. Year 2014! How I long for you! Your arrival is sure to kick me out of this zombie like stupor which I walk around in nowadays. The word 'Freedom' has taken on a whole new meaning for me. I don't even want a great love life anymore. To be forever free from the chains binding me to this private hell I've landed myself in, is all I ask for.